
FLAG = alerting the public to a person's questionable, and thus, flagworthy, character.
You're driving along, talking on your flagworthy blue tooth, and perusing the road for hot chicks and sweet car crashes. But you ask yourself, what type of cars are flaggable and why? Here are your answers:
Ice Cream Truck = No brainer flag. A modern day ice cream truck driver is your modern day pedophile. Beware of the soft serve. Ice cream truck drivers created the "15MPH School Zone Speed Limit," not because they want to sell more ice cream or improve child safety, but because 15 miles per hour is in fact the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles.
Station Wagon = Flaggable if contains rear-facing back seat or built before year 2000.
Mail Truck = No flag here, because mailmen are veterans and veterans like weapons. I am afraid to flag.
Smart Car/Mini Cooper = FLAG. Get an SUV asshole, this is America.
Prius = No flag because Larry David has one.
18 wheelers = FLAG. Have you ever seen a truck stop in middle America? Let me rephrase, have you ever seen a trucker getting a blowjob from a 300 lb tranny at a truck stop in middle America while selling meth out of his glove compartment....me neither.
I think it's good to note that a lot of these vehicles became flags over time, 20-30 years ago an ice cream truck or a station wagon were facts of life, but if you're caught driving one now...RED FLAG. The evolution of questionable transportation. One Prius driver doesn't necessarily rule out flagging any other prius driver...Yellow Flag at least on those pretentious do-gooders. Good no flag on the Mail Truck...postal workers ARE weapons.
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